The Hills have Strawberries

So I'm at my fabulous Harris Tetter the other day and I see they have a special on strawberries. By the by, I adore the 'Teet'. During our exile down in the F-state I thought I would die of withdrawals. Absence totally made my heart grow fonder and when we moved back in close proximity I practically humped the customer service desk my first trip there.

But I digress. So of course, I get some because berries are always so expensive. So when I got them home I proceeded to slice them up, warm them with a little water and sugar to freeze in baggies. If you're not doing this, I recommend, because then when you wanna have strawberry pancakes/waffles, ice cream topping, cheesecake topping, whatever topping (get out of the gutter, pervs), it's all ba-da-bing right there for the defrostin'. So then this monstrosity reveals itself which instantly reminded me ot that movie The Hills Have Eyes:
It's freakish mutant-ness froze me in my tracks. We've all encountered the occasional "double" strawberry where it's obvious two grew together. But I counted at least FIVE in this one. Gah! The carton didn't SAY genetically-modified or possibly radioactive, but you know how shady things are. There's no telling what cesspool Monsanto burped it out of.

Eventually my husband and I did actually eat the Teenage Mutant Ninja Strawberry, but were sadly unable to hulk-smash ANYTHING as of yet, but I'll keep you posted.